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The following blog is a summary of a message preached by Pastor Eddie Lawrence.

Watch the Sermon HERE!

Marriage isn't just a human invention - it's an institution created by God himself. When we understand the original design for marriage found in Scripture, we can build relationships that reflect God's heart and withstand life's challenges.

What Does Unity Really Mean in Marriage?

The first Hebrew word that defines biblical marriage is "ahad" - meaning one. But this isn't just numerical oneness; it represents a composite unity, like a cluster of grapes or an army functioning as one unit.

When Genesis says "they shall become one flesh," it describes something supernatural happening. Before saying "I do," two separate people exist. After the vows, God welds them together into a unified whole. This is why Jesus said, "What God has joined together, let not man separate."

How Do We Achieve True Unity?

Unity happens when both husband and wife align themselves with Jesus Christ. When you're both submitted to the Lord, you receive the grace needed to be the spouse God calls you to be. Arguments and division decrease when both partners are walking in step with their Savior.

Understanding Your Role as Helper and Leader

The second Hebrew phrase is "ezer kenegdo" - helper comparable. When God said it wasn't good for man to be alone, He created woman as a helper suitable for Adam.

This doesn't mean women are less than men. The same word "ezer" describes God as our helper in the Psalms. The Holy Spirit is called our helper in the New Testament. Being a helper speaks to strength and capability, not inferiority.

What Does Biblical Authority Look Like?

The curse in Genesis 3 brought misogyny and the devaluing of women's voices into the world. But Jesus came to deliver us from the curse's power. Christian husbands should be open to their wives' wisdom and input, just as Jesus listens to His bride, the church.

Biblical headship means protection, provision, and taking responsibility for the home's direction - not domination or dismissing your wife's voice.

Why Intimacy Requires Vulnerability

True intimacy means "into me see" - allowing yourself to be fully known. We all long to be fully loved, fully known, and fully accepted. In marriage, this happens through honest communication and emotional transparency.

What Prevents Intimacy in Marriage?

Fear and pride build walls between spouses. Fear says, "If they really knew me, they wouldn't love me." Pride says, "It's nobody's business who I really am." But marriage requires tearing down these walls.

Intimacy involves three dimensions:

 

  • Spiritual unity: Both believing in Jesus Christ
  • Soul connection: Learning to communicate and think together
  • Physical union: The gift of sexuality within marriage

 

How Loyalty Sustains Marriage Through Difficulties

The Hebrew word "chesed" describes covenant loyalty - a steadfast love that flows from promises made. This isn't just emotional feelings but a commitment that stands firm regardless of circumstances.

What Does Covenant Love Look Like Daily?

Chesed love is sacrificial and steady. It doesn't give up when feelings fade. Instead of fighting against each other, couples with this love pray for each other and stand back-to-back against external challenges.

This love shows up in practical ways - helping with household tasks, speaking encouraging words, and choosing to serve your spouse even when you don't feel like it.

Can Broken Marriages Be Restored?

While we live in a fallen world where marriages sometimes fail due to hardness of heart and sin, God is a God of mercy and restoration. Jesus can heal past wounds, cleanse shame from sexual sin, and pour healing oil into painful memories.

For those who've experienced abuse or trauma, Jesus came to heal the brokenhearted. The blood of Jesus cleanses from all sin and can restore what the enemy has stolen.

Life Application

This week, choose one area where your marriage needs strengthening. If you struggle with unity, commit to praying together daily. If communication is lacking, schedule regular times to talk without distractions. If intimacy has grown cold, take steps to be more vulnerable and transparent with your spouse.

Ask yourself these questions:

 

  • Am I aligned with Jesus Christ in a way that brings His grace into my marriage?
  • Do I value and listen to my spouse's voice and wisdom?
  • What walls have I built that prevent true intimacy?
  • How can I demonstrate covenant loyalty to my spouse this week?

 

Remember, marriage is God's institution, and He provides the grace needed to make it work when both partners submit to His design. Whether you've been married one year or sixty-five years, God wants to strengthen your union and make it a reflection of Christ's love for the church.